Fire: Lesson One

After having learned to make fires, I realize that my main mistake in the past was to use pieces that were too large too quickly.

If you want to build a successful fire at all, you must start with small pieces and gradually make the pieces bigger. A good starting place is paper or pine needles (tinder), then tiny twigs or cardboard, then very small pieces or wood (kindling), then slightly larger ones, and then slightly larger. Only when it’s really going should you add a log, and you don’t need to add a bunch. It’s ok to make a small fire.

According to our culture, I’m a highly successful person as a home owner with a doctoral level education. But this level of achievement didn’t come naturally to me. I used a lot of force (staying up late, using food and caffeine to keep myself up for longer, and denying myself rest), which compromised my health. In a sense, I’ve used large sticks and lighter fluid to succeed at life, but at what cost?

This culturally ordained method of living, necessitates a sacrifice of attention. Attention to those around me (human and otherwise) and to myself. It’s harder to care about road kill and habitat destruction when my own internal wilderness is also polluted. It’s harder notice the pain of those around me when I don’t slow down to notice my own pain.

I’m learning to go at more sustainable paces and allow space for myself to unfold without force. This allows me to maintain connection to the present, while also growing.

How does it feel when you allow yourself to grow at a pace that doesn’t require metaphorical lighter fluid?

Are there ways that you can support yourself and others around you in growing without lighter fluid?

What sacrifices of attention have you needed to make to sustain your life?

Notice any emotions that arise in your body with any of these questions and allow yourself to feel those sensations while grounding to the Earth.